life is all about decisions. every single decision made in this world affects everyone. it could be something big, like america deciding to vote for their first black president. it could even be something small, like deciding what to eat for dinner. no matter how great or significant the impact, every decision has its own impact and thus must be made carefully. do not belittle any decision. you may think that perhaps deciding what to eat is a small decision, doesnt really matter. go tell that to the woman who died after deciding to eat indian rojak man! so you see, every decision is impt. so think wisely.
have been going back and forth on my deicision. this blog post was initially supposed to be on how i have already made the biggest decision of my life yet, but before i could finish typing out this blog post, my determination wavered again. stupid huh. i think that decision making is really one of my greatest weakness. i guess i just think too much. too many "but what if..."s pop up when i try to make a decision. its like i can go on and on forever weighing the pros and cons and never make a decision. hmmm i think this is why i didnt get into med. a doctor needs to be damn strong in decision making. if i were going back and forth on my decision, my patient would be dead before i finally decide what to do man. sigh. life is full of ironies. the one thing that i have decided on and so unshakenably determined, is out of reach. but the other things that i am so undecided on and hesitant about is waving to me, screaming at me to make a decision. this may sound silly, but whenever i am faced with this kind of problems, the thought that prevents me from just breaking down and giving up entirely is that "god is testing me. god is presenting a challenge to me to see how i will react, to help me grow. if i am able to pull through, then pass the test."
i realised its useless for me to ask other's opinions. because i know that once i make a decision, i am usually quite stubborn about it. i am just afriad taht it is not the right one. so actually when i ask my friends what they think of my decision, what i am seeking for is not opinions, but rather assurance. in the end, even if the whole world says no, but one person says yes, i will still go along with my gut feel. but not without fear of regret of course.
i just need enough courage to embrace this decision.
I was flying 23:31
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Pilot
Credits: KIMHONG!
Images: x x
Inspiration: blogger
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Tuesday, 25 May 2010